I Don’t Wanna Appear Ungrateful

One of my oldest blogging buds, James, and I have a lot of commonalities, particularly our battle with depression (and bipolar disorder). He wrote a post, listing some of the things he’s grateful for. Think I’ll follow suit because the Depression is rearing its ugly head yet again.

Feel like withdrawing from society, ignoring all social media, etc. etc. You’ve heard it all before. You’ll probably hear it again.

Sometimes you need to take stock of the good shit in your life in order to maintain some semblance of sanity.

  • Despite the last week-and-a-half, I’m relatively healthy. I’m normally not hocking up half a lung. It’s a good year for me to quit smoking, since I still have my health. (And yes, that will certainly be one of the Resolutions for YOR.)
  • I have good friends. I may not touch base with them nearly as much as I should, but I know that they’re there for me should I need them.
  • I have a working computer. It’s ancient, it crawls along, but it works. And that’s saying something for a 4-yr-old laptop. I’m currently in the process of what will likely be a 17-hour defrag. I’m praying this is the year for the replacement to come along. (MacBook Pro, anyone?)
  • My brain works. Yes, I fight depression, PTSD, bipolar disorder, ADD, social anxiety, and who knows what else. But compared to many who have it far worse? I’m thankful that my mental faculties are pretty much operating at full capacity. Usually.
  • My car works pretty damn good, considering it’s 10 years old. I’m not a person who gets hung up on vehicles, since they’re a utilitarian kind of thing as far as I’m concerned. Get me where I need to go (and back) and I don’t really give a shit that there’s a swamp in the back seat or that rust is perhaps the only type of molecule holding the roof together. Well, that and the bubble gum.
  • Rumor has it that Apple is developing an iPhone for Verizon. I hope it’s true. Another rumor holds that the 4th generation iPhone will be announced on June 22nd. My upgrade pricing became available in January, so I *could* get myself a 3GS, but why? When the next iPhone is due to be released in a matter of months, I’m not tying myself to a 2-year deal for LAST year’s model. I’ll be good and patient and wait. I’m praying that Apple announces not just the next AT&T iPhone in June, but the Verizon iPhone, as well. Cuz when they do? Hasta lasagna, AT&T.
  • I have a place to live. That’s not to be taken for granted. I’m fortunate.
  • Food. I have that, too, even if lately everything tastes like cardboard to me.
  • Daughters. Despite the troubles I’ve caused in those relationships, I couldn’t be prouder of my girls. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: they are my crowning achievement.
  • Family. Like most people, I have my share of dysfunctionality in my family. Hell, sometimes I feel like I’m the sane one. But I love my family, and I know that I’m lucky to have them.
  • Health care. I’d be screwed if not for the V.A. Thank God I have them for my physical AND mental health. Otherwise I’d be broker than I already am.
  • SillyBring is only three weeks away and then Shannon arrives!

There are many other items, I’m sure, but these are the things that spring to mind. I have a lot to be grateful for, even if my miserable curmudgeonly self doesn’t mention them as often as I should. Wish I could throw this one in there, though:

  • I get laid three times a day.
20 Responses to I Don’t Wanna Appear Ungrateful
  1. Zoeyjane
    March 30, 2010 | 12:47 pm

    I totally agreed with everything you said and the points that were applicable to me. Especially the last part.
    Zoeyjane´s last blog ..On lack of trepidation My ComLuv Profile

    Reply

    Secondhand Karl Reply:

    @Zoeyjane, I’m sorry to hear about that.

    Reply

  2. Finn
    March 30, 2010 | 1:09 pm

    “I get laid three times a day.”

    I’d like to add that one too, but where woudl I find the TIME?

    I’m burnt out. Perhaps a little gratitude reflection is in order for me too.
    Finn´s last blog ..While You Were Out My ComLuv Profile

    Reply

    Secondhand Karl Reply:

    @Finn, Burnt out is a good way of putting it. Hell, if the married people aren’t even getting laid, what hope do I have?

    Reply

  3. Sheila
    March 30, 2010 | 1:43 pm

    You should quit smoking now!

    Because I’m a non-smoker now and misery loves company.

    For real.

    I’m glad that, even in the darkness, you can still see and appreciate the good things in life. Total Silver Lining FTW!
    Sheila´s last blog ..Where Do I Go From Here? My ComLuv Profile

    Reply

    Secondhand Karl Reply:

    @Sheila, If I quit now, it’d never work. I’m not ready. I’m thinking some time this summer.

    Reply

  4. Ren
    March 30, 2010 | 2:14 pm

    I’m with you on the iPhone upgrade plan, except that I’m not sure I would switch carriers.
    Ren´s last blog ..Macro Monday #55 My ComLuv Profile

    Reply

    Secondhand Karl Reply:

    @Ren, I’ve beat the AT&T drum to death before. Small town, crappy Edge network. But voice-wise, I don’t have a problem with them. Pretty good coverage. It’s just the data network…maybe I should move to Austin.

    Reply

  5. Kevin Spencer
    March 30, 2010 | 3:44 pm

    I signed my life away with AT&T for another two years back in December when I got my 3GS iPhone. Been with them for years, back when it was Cingular. I dunno, for me, AT&T hasn’t actually been that bad. I get a really good 3G signal everywhere I go so I’m quite happy. When my contract is up though, then I’ll see if I want to get whatever the latest iPhone version is or try out whatever the latest Android phone is available. The Google Nexus 1 that I played with recently is really quite sweet.
    Kevin Spencer´s last blog ..Ink My ComLuv Profile

    Reply

    Secondhand Karl Reply:

    @Kevin Spencer, Love AT&T’s voice coverage, no troubles there. It’s the data part of the plan I have trouble with. Not enough 3G coverage. I’ve seen firsthand that my friends on Verizon have 3G where I only have Edge and it’s irritating. AT&T’s commercials on TV are full of shit.

    Interested in the Google Nexus…I hear it is pretty cool. But I’d have a hard time parting ways with my iPhone.

    Reply

  6. james
    March 30, 2010 | 5:48 pm

    Good list, man. It’s important to put things in perspective every once in a while and remind ourselves that life isn’t complete shit. Even though our feelings may tell us the opposite is true. Keep fighting the good fight, amigo.

    Peace,
    J.
    james´s last blog ..Really I am. My ComLuv Profile

    Reply

    Secondhand Karl Reply:

    @james, You, too, sir.

    Reply

  7. Sybil Law
    March 30, 2010 | 6:12 pm

    That is an excellent, excellent list!!
    Z thinks you’re cool as shit, too. There’s that. :)

    I need to be getting laid 3 times a day, too!
    Dammit.

    Reply

    Secondhand Karl Reply:

    @Sybil Law, I happen to think Z is cool as shit, too, as is her mom.

    Reply

  8. CP
    March 30, 2010 | 7:13 pm

    Am I the only one here who IS getting laid three times a day?

    Oh, wait. It has to be WITH someone?

    Reply

    Secondhand Karl Reply:

    @CP, Doesn’t *have* to be…believe me, I have plenty of *that* action. It’s just preferable to have another person involved.

    Reply

  9. Wendy
    March 30, 2010 | 10:53 pm

    Yeah, I’d like to get laid three times a day, too. Glad you thought of the things you have to be grateful for. It helps to remind yourself sometimes.
    Wendy´s last blog ..If You Don’t Have Anything Good to Say My ComLuv Profile

    Reply

    Secondhand Karl Reply:

    @Wendy, It does, yeah.

    Reply

  10. muskrat
    March 31, 2010 | 11:03 am

    Good list, dude! Hope you’re having a good day today.
    muskrat´s last blog ..garbage in, garbage out My ComLuv Profile

    Reply

    Secondhand Karl Reply:

    @muskrat, So-so day, but thanks. Hope you’re having a good one.

    Reply

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