No. Thanks.
So what do you say when a friend asks for a guest post but you’re right in the middle of a self-imposed blog hiatus because your brain is so fried you can’t string two coherent sentences together?
The logical answer, the sane answer is no, thanks.
But no one has ever accused me of being sane or logical so here I am. I asked to be put at the end of schedule, just in time for you all to be totally over the whole “Summer of Love” concept. That accomplished two things: It gave me more time to come up with an idea (which I clearly failed at doing), plus it played the odds that no one would even bother reading it. One look in the old feed reader and a click to that little X in the upper right corner and off you’ll go to visit Dooce or someone who’s kind of a big deal on the Internet or someone who is far more interesting than I am.
So, um, I’m Finn. Some of you read me, some of you don’t but know me from my comments around the blogosphere and some of you wouldn’t know me if you fell on me and probably couldn’t care less who the fuck I am. I’m a Leo, born on August 10 (it’s a supposed to be a very rare birthday, but it’s Antonio Banderas’ too, so there’s that) and I like long walks on the beach, pina coladas and getting caught in the rain. Sex in a five-star hotel on the beach with the windows open isn’t bad either.
If you’ve read this far, congratulations, your check is in the mail. It will, undoubtedly, bounce, but it’s the thought that counts, no?
Right.
I do a lot of navel-gazing at my place; I’ll spare you that here. But I have spent this summer contemplating many things, including what kind of post would be appropriate here. I considered poetry, but don’t most people hate that? I considered a creative take on the original Summer of Love, the one that I was born during (please don’t do the math on that—it makes the baby Jesus cry to know that I’m getting fucking old). I even thought about gracing you with one of my infamous Conversations with God, but they can get a bit raunchy and I know our wonderful host Karl has a soft spot for Catholicism that scabbed over in my heart long ago.
So I give you this, a post about nothing. Now Jerry Seinfeld and the Baby Jesus are crying.
Who wants me to do a guest post for them next? What’s that? Oh… yeah.
No. Thanks.
Filed under Guest Post | Comments (26)
26 Responses to “No. Thanks.”
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We’d get a long fabulously because I love insanity and blog posts about nothing. So? Great success on your guest blogging!
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August 25th, 2009 at 9:45 am
@Sassy, Insanity is so worth the trouble isn’t it? I highly recommend it!
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I really love it that you can put “baby Jesus” and “fucking” in the same sentence. lol. Great post! You really pull off the whole post about nothing thing.
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August 25th, 2009 at 9:46 am
@Wendy, Thanks! Hey, if you liked the Baby Jesus sentence, you should read some of my Conversations with God posts. Lots of mentions of Jesus and fucking.
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You don’t have to pay me to read your guest post. Silly.
Oh, by the way, the check totally cleared. I’m guessing the cable guy got short changed though.
Wanna do a guest post for me? Oh, yeah.
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August 25th, 2009 at 9:47 am
@Lynda, You’re far more important than the cable guy. At least until it’s time for “TrueBlood.”
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I know who you are and I’d TOTALLY scoop you up and take you to the hospital if I fell on you. Then we’d force them to inject us with Demerol so we could laugh at the ceiling all night long!
Yes, welcome to crazy.
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August 25th, 2009 at 9:48 am
@Hilly, You know what? That actually sounds good. Maybe not the hospital though — wait time’s too long. An urgent care center would be great, especially if there’s a Chick-Fil-A nearby. Demerol, junk food and Hilly, oh my!
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Hey what’s up? I’m doing fine. The dogs are making my life easier because they eat stress somehow. I had no breakfast yet but I am thinking of picking something up after taking my daughter to school. I love Twitter but I wouldn’t marry it. Seven brides for seven brothers
this? Was a comment about nothing.
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August 25th, 2009 at 9:49 am
@whall, You make an excellent point. About what, I don’t know.
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And yet your nothing is better than MY last nothing, so there’s that!
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August 25th, 2009 at 9:49 am
@Sybil Law, You do nothing far better than I do. Wait… that was supposed to be a compliment.
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Oh I know who you are… I know EXACTLY who you are!
Thanks to the team of private detectives I have following you.
There. now you can become all paranoid and have something to blog about!
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August 25th, 2009 at 9:50 am
@Dave2, Is THAT who that guy was? I think I “accidentally” ran over him with my car. Twice.
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Ha ha, love it Finn! I also asked to be at the end and have been out of ideas myself lately. I may just leave blank space if I can’t get my post finished (or not, just kidding Karl, yeah, I’m kidding. That’s right.)
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August 25th, 2009 at 8:04 pm
@Black Belt Mama, A blank space? Brilliant. Why didn’t I think of that?
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I love posts about nothing!
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August 25th, 2009 at 8:05 pm
@Jamie, It seems many people do, which is good for me because I had nothing.
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My birthday is August 8th. So, yay for Leo’s! And somewhere Jerry Seinfeld is smiling
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August 25th, 2009 at 8:06 pm
@Becky, Leos rule. Period. You think Jerry’s smiling? Not about this though, right?
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If I believed in guest posts I would have you guest post on my blog. I do not, however, believe in having blogsitters when I am not posting on my blog. The reasons are many, and none have to do with me not thinking you are one of the awesomest women in the universe.
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August 25th, 2009 at 7:08 pm
@Poppy, I have no idea what that remark says about me. Hmm.
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August 25th, 2009 at 7:24 pm
@Secondhand Karl, I think that Poppy doing a guest post for you says a lot. Don’t worry, be happy, Karl!
I have to agree with her 100%, but I don’t mind doing guest posts for other people, because it’s their blog. My blog is so personal, I can’t imagine having someone else write on it.
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August 25th, 2009 at 8:06 pm
@Poppy, And I believe in the power of the Poppy. You are made of awesome. Totally.
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Heh, well done, even if you said basically nothing. Still thrilled to have you here. I actually have my laptop hooked up for only the 3rd time in a week. Guess I should write something for tomorrow. Ahem.
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August 25th, 2009 at 8:07 pm
@Secondhand Karl, Or you could write nothing. Unhook that laptop and go have fun.
Thanks for the invite; I was thrilled to be asked. xo
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