Twenty Things I Would Love to Say, But Have Not
Thanks to the lovely Angela Gunn for her guest post yesterday. I had a lovely meal while reading it. Two, actually. Tomorrow, yet another exciting guest blogger, so stay tuned.
Last night was insanely social for me for some reason. From 10pm thru till about 3 this morning, it was one phone call after another, mixed with IM, Twitter, texting, Skype, webcams…exhausting. Fun, but exhausting. And GeekyTaiTai gives great tongue.
Then there’s all the shit I’ve gotten from this post over the last few days. Amazing how many people don’t seem to have a sense of humor. If you can’t recognize a totally over-the-top spoof, you probably will want to stop reading this blog, like, now. In fact, I hope you will.
Still, it’s good to be back in the blogging saddle. If I can get people’s panties in a twist on Day 2 of my return, all is not lost.
Sybil Law and I had a great convo last night. How I love that woman, though she really did pressure me to write the vile post I was fantasizing about, so I don’t know if she’ll be my Go-To Girl for advice when I’m trying to calm myself down in the future.
I seem to have extended my annual Social Season (this year consisting of TequilaCon, ConFab, and BlogHer in a couple of weeks) another month. Just booked flights to Alabama and Kentucky for next month. It’s Kim’s birthday so I’ll be there for that, then flying to Louisville (which Diana assured me multiple times via webcamchat I’m pronouncing ridiculously badly) to hang with Laci and the other local Kentucky folk.
At some point, I’m really going to need to seal myself into my cave for some serious hibernation. But for now, I’ll gladly deplete my Social Battery over and over.
There are always a million memes screaming around the Net, but one that happens to catch my eye most every time someone blogs it is this one. Thought I’d give it a try. I’m pretty much a straight-shooter, but I do keep a lot of shit to myself. Therapists have told me that’s not a good thing.
Things I’d Love to Say To Certain People, But Haven’t
- I used to really enjoy you. Now I see what a mean-spirited, pathetic little person you are.
- I really miss you like crazy, but feel like I can’t be with you any more, for obvious reasons.
- I’d never treat my worst enemy the way you’ve treated me lately. God only knows what you say behind my back, because the shit you’ve said publicly is pretty vile.
- You have a lot of people snowed, which has always amazed me. Yet some of us can see your Emperor’s New Clothes just fine. Just who those people are would surprise you.
- Lighten the fuck up, asshole.
- I can only pray you don’t believe everything you’re being told. Because most of it is utter bullshit.
- I thank God for you every day. True friends are a rare commodity, and I’m glad to see those few people for who they are these days.
- I’d love to verbally thrash you publicly, but I don’t believe in airing my laundry in public. Kind of the opposite of your M.O., really.
- Out of all the people I know, you make it the hardest to bite my tongue. By the way, it’d be nice if there was a Band-Aid that sticks to the tongue.
- I wish you weren’t married.
- I’ll never forget the last three words you said to me. Some things are truly unforgivable, which seems ironic now.
- I have PTSD, bipolar, ADD, severe depressive disorder, and yet somehow you make me look sane. Way to go.
- I have the hugest crush on you, but will likely never act on it, let alone tell you.
- Just because you follow something with “Just kidding,” it doesn’t erase the assholish words you just said.
- There was a time when I lived for the Drama, but when I watch you orchestrate it like a Master Conductor these days, it sickens me.
- There aren’t adequate words for how sorry I am, but I don’t know what else to say or do to make reparations.
- Sometimes inappropriate is funny, but that wasn’t. At all.
- I wish you’d forget I exist.
- I often imagine slapping you because the most-uttered words from your mouth are, “I’m sorry.” It’s like if you say “I love you” 578 times a day to the same person – the words lose their importance.
- I’m a very good judge of character, but I’m sure glad I was wrong about my first impressions of you.
There, that feels slightly better. Perhaps there’s no need to throw Molotov Cocktails anyone’s way, after all.
Filed under Local Goings On, Memes, Rants, Travel | Comments (40)40 Responses to “Twenty Things I Would Love to Say, But Have Not”
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What about Tom Collinses or Mojitos? Can you throw a few of those my way?
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July 8th, 2009 at 5:47 pm
@Ron, For you? Both.
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July 9th, 2009 at 9:28 pm
@Ron, ooh, i love a good Tom Collins.
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I’ve learned over the years, keeping that stuff bottled up will only hurt me, not the other people.
I hope you found a little healing in this post
If I don’t make it down to Alabama for Kim’s birthday, I will definitely see ya when you get here to the Ville.
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July 8th, 2009 at 5:52 pm
@Sodapop, Yeah, it is rather exhausting, keeping that crap inside. Hopefully see you in *both* places.
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10, 13, and 20 are about me aren’t they?
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July 8th, 2009 at 6:43 pm
@*pixie*, Yes. As is #12.
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July 8th, 2009 at 6:44 pm
@Secondhand Karl, Ha!
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Oh sure – blame me!!!!
Seriously – I just think this is therapeutic for you. Everyone else has done it, so you should be able to, too.
Unless I am not catching you calling me a loser bitch in one of those. Then, I kill you.
Hahaha
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July 8th, 2009 at 9:11 pm
@Sybil Law, I only blame you because you’re worthy of it, babe. And yes, it was therapeutic. And hardly any of the items are about you.
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i say tell the folks. seriously. why keep that shit in?
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July 8th, 2009 at 9:11 pm
@hello haha narf, Because, babe, the fallout would be immense.
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July 9th, 2009 at 9:29 pm
@Secondhand Karl, but that’s entertainment!
ok, maybe not…for the most part
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Oh – and I thought you’d link to the panty sniffer who was freaking on you about the post.
Dammit!
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July 8th, 2009 at 9:11 pm
@Sybil Law, Which one?
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This meme drives me insane(r) because I’m supersnoopy and always want to know who you want to say it to, even though I know it’s none of my damned business.
I’m kinda 1/2 & 1/2 on this; say it to them or here to get it out…good thing it’s your choice & not mine. I am glad you got it out though.
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July 8th, 2009 at 9:12 pm
@Tug, I know, the curiosity factor always grabs me, too.
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I get that whole wanting to shoot straight but at the same time either being too nice to say it or not wanting to deal with the drama load that would surely follow should you so choose to speak it out loud thing.
For me, even just saying it without saying who it’s to is therapeutic.
I still can’t believe someone got all huffy about your post. What a frickin’ lamesauce.
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July 8th, 2009 at 9:13 pm
@Sheila (Charm School Reject), You hit it right on the head, darlin’. It’s the drama thing. And I believe “lamesauce” is one of my new favorite words.
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Well !! Tell us how you really feel !!
That was a great post !
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July 9th, 2009 at 3:18 pm
@Kim, I feel better, actually. That was quite a cathartic meme.
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I am *so* stealing this one.
Oh, and I told you I wasn’t married.
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July 9th, 2009 at 3:18 pm
@Angel Smith, I know. You only remind me daily, babe.
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Are you a bottler too? I don’t even have the guts to post something like this on my blog, though I have seen similar on others blogs.
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July 9th, 2009 at 3:19 pm
@Lynda, I usually don’t have the guts, either. I’m a bottler, except with very close friends.
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The Summer of Love is truly on its way! That’s a lot of love right there!
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July 9th, 2009 at 3:19 pm
@Dave2, Love. Hate. Thin lines, etc.
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I hope these made you feel better.
Why do I have the feeling many of these are directed at one person?
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July 9th, 2009 at 3:21 pm
@Finn, It did, a little. Thanks. Some of the individual items are directed at more than one person, but clearly I’m not going to be providing a key.
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You certainly do have a way with words. I’m a new fan, lured by the BlogHer Hard post from last week, which I found awesome and hilarious and did people seriously give you shit about it? Because those people need to remove the stick from their asses and learn to take a joke, which ironically would be on my list of 20 things if I ever made one.
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July 9th, 2009 at 3:28 pm
@Jill, Hi Jill, nice to meet ya. A few people were upset about Monday’s post, yeah, but a small number. It’s all good now, I think.
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I’m fairly certain that one of these is about me although not quite sure how deep the venom shoots. With that said, I think that we ALL need to learn to say things to people *before* they get to this point, myself included. Once we reach this level of anger, vitriol, and mean-spirited jabs, I don’t know how there’s any coming back from that.
You know, anger being a secondary emotion and all that stuff.
When I did this on my blog and encouraged others to do this on my blog last month, I almost felt sick to my stomach afterward. It really made me take a look at myself and how completely mean and angry I’d let myself become, mostly due to my divorce and my own insecurities. Posts like this, even when there *aren’t* shitty things about me, make me sick to my stomach now.
I’m not lecturing at all. I don’t have the right to come to your place and lecture…I guess I saw this and felt a little bit sad. About everything.
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July 9th, 2009 at 4:36 pm
@Hilly, You know I agree regarding the open communication, but that isn’t always available to people, and requires two willing parties.
It’s incredibly difficult for people to bounce back from “mean-spirited jabs” and behavior, true. Forgiveness can sometimes be impossible. Lord knows we all have those moments. It’s sad and mind-boggling to me, too, when anyone who cares for someone else very deeply gets snubbed and attacked by the very people they care for.
But what are you going to do? Life goes on. We can only hope to learn from the mistakes we’ve made, make better choices in the future, and choose more carefully who we allow into our inner circle of friends. It’s a life-long endeavor for most of us, and I’m getting there.
Hope all is well with you.
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I know it’s ALL about me….
heh.
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July 10th, 2009 at 12:58 am
@bubblewench, Well, most of them, yes.
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these memes are always fun because the reader inevitably wonders if they’re being addressed, even when it’s more than likely that they are not.
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July 10th, 2009 at 12:59 am
@Peau, Ha, very true.
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This was powerful in a painful, healing way. I hope you say what you need to say (sorry for putting John Mayer in your head, but you DESERVE it for all the Flight of the Conchords songs I now sing because of you).
You are many shades, my friend. I find the new colors on you very lovely.
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July 17th, 2009 at 11:03 pm
@Mocha, Aw, you’re a sweetie. I almost teared up. I don’t know what the hell is going on lately, it’s liked I just watched a “Beaches” marathon or something. Good thing I’m getting ready for BlogHer. Hardly *any* emotion there.
And you could do far worse than having Flight of the Conchords songs as earworms.
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[...] Karl did this meme thing a short while ago, and I was appropriate intrigued and decided to pass it on. The idea is [...]