Wow, am I ever exhausted. I had a wonderful time this weekend at BlogHer 2009 in Chicago. Still here, of course, because Neil and I are smart travelers and we booked an extra day and don’t leave till tomorrow.
First off, allow me to share with you my infamous three custom BlogHer t-shirts for this year. They caused quite the stir. Not one single person came up to me and said they didn’t like them.
I think there are probably 300-400 photos of me on many different Flickr accounts. Can’t even count how many wonderful ladies asked me to pose for them.
Thursday’s Shirt
Friday’s Shirt
And the Grand Finale: Saturday’s Shirt
My social battery has been repeatedly depleted all weekend, but there are many amazing stories to tell. That’ll come tomorrow. For now, I just wanted to show you many of my favorite ladies at BlogHer this year. A photo retrospective, if you will.
Aren’t they gorgeous? Some of the most amazing women on the planet, and I wanted to put them all in my pocket and take them home with me.
The cheeseburger one cracked me up. And I loved your shirts. I think my favorite was Friday’s.
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 26th, 2009 at 7:46 pm
@*pixie*, Thanks, man, the Cheeseburger Party was INSANE. Must have been a million people in that suite.
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lmao. Not what I expected. Now that I think of it… I totally should have expected it. lol. SO glad you had fun! I hope your social battery isn’t completely depleted, though!
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 26th, 2009 at 7:47 pm
@Wendy, Well, now that 99% of the attendees are gone, I’m feeling much more comfortable. Aside from not being able to find my fucking roommate.
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I recognize some of those.
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 27th, 2009 at 1:18 am
@Crystal, I do, too! Ha.
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I love the recap.
Calling you later – maybe.
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 27th, 2009 at 1:18 am
@Sybil Law, Well, the REAL recap will come (probably) tomorrow. Er, today.
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Oh so now I know why we never got to have a real conversation–not enough cleavage on my part! Live and learn…
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 27th, 2009 at 1:18 am
@Heather, Ha…believe me, I wanted to. BlogHer is just INSANE.
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Hey kid – i followed the link to the blog post about your t-shirt. Had to post a comment there; basically, yeh the shirts are sexist. Are they the same thing as Sexism-with-a-capital-S, the kind of sexism that has been oppressing women for centuries? Well, considering the female-male ratio at Blogher, I suspect not. I also think it’s a pussy move to be pissed off, then bitch about it later in a blog post.
Glad you enjoyed. See you next year in NYC
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 27th, 2009 at 1:20 am
@Trish/Astrogirl426, Had a great time. I’ll likely write about the sexism thing in a post. Then again, I may not. Can’t wait till next year if you’re coming.
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karl~~i love it you BOOG!!!
i had to shut down my site as you properly saw on twitter~~i will dm you my new site
fucking brother
i so want the second shirt~~are they for sale?
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 27th, 2009 at 1:20 am
@ms snarky nice bitch, Not for sale yet, but should be this week. Thanks. I’ll have to check out the new blog this week.
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Was I the only fucking flat chested bitch at BlogHer? I should’ve worn two freakin bras and chicken cutlets because I’m so ashamed! Well, not really but kinda.
::le sigh::
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Angel Smith Reply:
July 26th, 2009 at 11:22 pm
@Sheila (Charm School Reject),
You’ll be glad for little boobs when yours are still perky when you are 80, sugar!
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 27th, 2009 at 1:21 am
@Sheila (Charm School Reject), You’re not flat, babe. Though the chicken cutlets would make for some hysterical cleavage shots.
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Alright, if I’m being completely honest here, I probably would have put you in a joint lock until you changed into a nice plain polo shirt. However, I also KNOW you in real life and know that you’ve never treated me with anything less than complete and total respect. I also don’t believe you have any pictures of my boobs (nor will you ever). That being said, I went over to Grace’s site, read her post and left her a comment. I think she should have spoken up at the conference instead of waiting and writing a blog post about it. That sort of rubs me the wrong way. But while I’m championing assertiveness on her site, I’m also going to do it here and say that I think we should discuss your t-shirts for next year. If we’re going to find you a good woman Karl, BlogHer is a good place to find one; but wearing that t-shirt isn’t going to make it happen mister!
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 27th, 2009 at 1:24 am
@Black Belt Mama, Ha, I can certainly count on you to be honest. One of the many reasons I like you. Believe me, I know they’re not the SMARTEST shirts to wear at BlogHer. I’m vacillating between more appropriate humor shirts and even worse ones. But in all honesty, I’ll probably just keep the status quo.
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I like Thursday’s shirt the best.
The stir that was caused was like a small little wind storm that quickly passed. People can have their opinions, but they will never take the K out of Karl.
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 27th, 2009 at 1:24 am
@martymankins, True dat.
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Yah, but did you know any of there names?
(About the shirts…for crying out loud, find something else to get your undies in a bundle about. IT’S A JOKE, people. I’m done now.)
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 27th, 2009 at 1:24 am
@Shelli, Well, I knew all their names last night. Heh.
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For the record, I am not That Grace. I am Another Grace. I met and do like That Grace who exercised her right to free speech. This is the American way. And just as Brother Karl exercised his right to free speech. Yes! Lucky to be in America!
I’ll stop before my Inner Gay Guy (Ramon) breaks into a medley of West Side Story showtunes. In the meantime, I send sweet sibling love to you, dollin.
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 27th, 2009 at 1:26 am
@Grace Davis, I agree. It’s totally her space over there and I’ll fight to the death for her right to use her space however she wants.
Loved hanging with you today, Grace. You rock my freaking world.
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If she doesn’t have the ovaries to tell you she doesn’t like your shirt to your face, then that’s her fault. I ought to go to the next blogher and show ‘em what really offensive shirts look like.
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 27th, 2009 at 1:28 am
@Ron, That’s really my only beef out of the whole thing, that I wish she would have talked to me face to face. But hey, to each her own.
And if only they’d seen the shirts I came up with but DIDN’T order/wear.
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Ron Reply:
July 28th, 2009 at 12:45 am
@Secondhand Karl, It must be nice to live in a world where some asshole’s* shirts are such an affront.
*not that I’m calling you an asshole, but she is, so I’m using her terms.
Edited to add: I’d call you a fucking asshole.
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 28th, 2009 at 6:28 pm
@Ron, Heh, you sir? Awesome. An asshole, but awesome.
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I would say this to Adam too so please don’t think I am singling you out but uh, those shirts *are* offensive. I realize that you both have friends that you know who appreciate those t-shirts but at a conference full of women? Probably not the best idea. It almost seems like a ploy for attention, wearing things like that. Like, somehow being that offensive will turn into a good thing that gets you noticed.
And I mean the collective “you” here.
With that said, on the flip side, I don’t like the way that other girl handled it. She basically called you all out on Twitter, demanding that you defend yourself after she judged you both by your “covers”.
I guess the simple fact of the matter is that we all get judged in one way or another, for being too fat, too tall, too this, too that and so there’s not much we can do about that. However, when it comes to wearing t-shirts that are controversial, why put yourself in that situation?
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 27th, 2009 at 1:32 am
@Hilly, You know it takes a lot to offend me. Appreciate the honesty. And in a way, they ARE a ploy to get noticed. I’m really considering writing about it, but think it’s best just to let it drop. I’ve said what I have to say about it, don’t think there’s anything new I could add to the mix.
It’s ironic to me that, at a conference which celebrates women and tolerance and acceptance, some are still very quick to judge. I’m pretty upfront and like to handle things in the same fashion. Not everyone deals with shit the same way. I get that.
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Shirts = totally offensive. Pics of nothing but bewbs to describe your BlogHer experience = a little scary. My love for you in spite of both = unwavering.
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 27th, 2009 at 1:32 am
@Michellew_, Clearly that isn’t the REAL recap.
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I’m proud to call you my friend, even if you do offend people. You can’t please all of the people all of the time. Just do you, and if people don’t bother to get to know you and/or your intentions, they probably wouldn’t click well with you anyway.
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 27th, 2009 at 1:32 am
@Angel Smith, Word.
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Well if you had walked around with your penis out, I’m sure there would’ve been talk about that, too.
Oh wait…did I miss something?
(See, told ya you could see plenty of boobs for free.)
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 27th, 2009 at 11:36 am
@Kris, I was quite offended when Naked Jen came down the stairs Thursday night TOTALLY NAKED and wandered the lobby for 90 seconds before donning clothes. My sensibilities are quite delicate. But I’d never wander naked through the lobby myself. I have body image issues.
And I’m not even kidding.
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Karl, Karl, Karl. What are we going to do with you?
I have to agree with both Hilly and BBM; this is possibly not the right kind of attention to draw your soulmate to your side. And probably in poor taste given where you were. But there are so many other, important things to get offended about. Like the fact that women, on average, make about 30% less then men. Or that people tend to get more jail time for mortgage fraud than for rape. Etc., etc.
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 27th, 2009 at 11:37 am
@Finn, I know, I know. I’m an idiot. Hopefully a lovable idiot, but nevertheless…
It takes a lot to offend me, but the stats you mention DO offend me.
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I’m still clearly baffled by how those are offensive (thinking Jenny the Bloggess’s sticker, here), but I wasn’t offended when someone remarked on my “pregnancy” this weekend, so maybe I’m just dead inside. That must be it.
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 27th, 2009 at 11:38 am
@Crystal, LOL. Being dead inside is probably the furthest thing from how I’d describe you. ADORE you. You’re smart and funny and down-to-earth. I dig you a lot.
Except for that whole you-being-married part. I don’t like that so much.
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Looks like you met some lovely ladies this weekend, Karl! And you’re quite the photographer.
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 28th, 2009 at 12:18 pm
@churchpunkmom, Whew, home and awake, finally. I DID meet some lovely ladies, as I do every year.
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I see part me in the background for the one with the colors and the champagne (I won’t say whose chest it is).
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 28th, 2009 at 12:19 pm
@Muskrat, Ha! Really enjoyed you, dude. And that’s rare for me, to click with a guy at all.
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I’ve read the post over at Grace’s site and I have to say that while I think she possibly could have handled it differently, I can see her point.
As a few others have pointed out, the shirts weren’t fantastic. I mean, you were one of a handful of men at a women’s conference and you thought you needed the shirts to get attention? Probably not likely that you wouldn’t have been noticed and approached there no matter what you were wearing.
I do think it’s too bad that so many people accused her of not having a sense of humour. I love you and Adam to bits, and think I have a great sense of humour- but didn’t particularly love the shirts.
All negative aside though? I do think that you’ve handled it well. Not devoting a whole post criticizing her beliefs, and leaving a very respectful comment on her post. Thank you for that.
I’ve actually thought about this situation a lot over the weekend, as I think it brings up some interesting intellectual points.
I may even post about it (in a more general way) myself.
xo
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 28th, 2009 at 12:23 pm
@Princess of the Universe, Oh, I see her point, too. I’m glad she spoke up about it on her blog. And contrary to popular belief, I’m not looking to offend anyone. It does happen, but it’s always unintentional, and I prefer talking one-on-one about such things, truly.
That said, I honestly believe Grace and I would get along smashingly under different circumstances. It bothers me that anyone feels they aren’t “safe” at BlogHer when I push myself rather hard every year to promote BlogHer both before, during, and after the conference.
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OK…
First, I thank you for coming to my blog and making am mostly-respectful reply to my post. I appreciate that.
Secondly, about not confronting you in person. You said that you have severe social phobia. Do you REALLY not understand why I couldn’t say anything in person? Besides, having a dialogue with you about your shirts isn’t the point. Having a dialogue with this community about why this is or is not acceptable is. And that wouldn’t have happened if I had just approached you and said something about them.
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 28th, 2009 at 12:26 pm
@Grace, You’re welcome. As I say often, I may be an ass, but I am not an asshole. I dig that you are commenting here.
As for confronting me in person, I get your reasoning. But that’s why I specifically stated on your blog that I wish you WOULD have come found me. I am sorry you felt unsafe, particularly if it had anything to do with my idiocy. And yes, we COULD have dialogued about it. I’m actually a very rational (well, mostly) guy.
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God, I love the shirts!!! I understand that not everbody would love them, but you’re just being you. I get it.
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 28th, 2009 at 12:27 pm
@Suzy Voices, Thanks.
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I really enjoyed meeting you and I think you’re great! Thanks for being my smoking buddy.
I’m looking forward to going again next year and can’t wait to see your shirts!
Linda~
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 28th, 2009 at 12:28 pm
@Employee No. 3699, I’m thinking next year of having Kevlar linings installed in the 2010 shirts.
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I thought your shirts were hilarious.
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 28th, 2009 at 12:29 pm
@Amy, Aw, thanks. I’m glad.
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It’s funny, for each boob picture I gave that person a face in my mind. The cheeseburger photo made me LOL.
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 28th, 2009 at 12:29 pm
@Poppy, Ha, I will NEVER tell who is who in those photos. Hell, I’ve already forgotten the specifics. I do know who participated, though. And the cheeseburger pic may be my favorite.
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Sheila (Charm School Reject) Reply:
July 28th, 2009 at 12:41 pm
@Poppy, I can tell you who two of ‘em are
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 28th, 2009 at 6:30 pm
@Sheila (Charm School Reject), NO TELLING! I promised each of those women that there’d be no faces in the pictures, no nametags, no links.
I know you WOULDN’T, but I’m just sayin’.
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Really only one logical comment to make – I can haz cheezburger?
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 28th, 2009 at 12:30 pm
@PhiltheWebGuy, LOL. Man, you rock. So glad we met and I was more than happy to be able to turn you onto some of my favorite people, EVER.
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Loved meeting you. Sunday night was the best – you’re great! : ) (Did that sound dirty?)
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 28th, 2009 at 6:31 pm
@Twenty Four At Heart, Likewise, I’m sure. Sunday night with you sitting outside the burger joint and then inside the Chi-Bar. Was made of Win.
And yes, it sounded dirty, and I loved it.
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My breasts! On your blog! Third from the bottom! 32D’s suckas!
*Whew* Ok, just had to get that out.
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 28th, 2009 at 11:24 pm
@Coal Miner’s Granddaughter, Well, if you’re gonna out YOURSELF, there’s not much I can do about that.
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Karl, I’m so glad that you weren’t biased against small breasts. Glad I could represent the itty-bitty titties.
It was wonderful meeting you and I’m glad that you have a sense of humor. Just wish others did…
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 31st, 2009 at 8:58 pm
@Tara Anderson, Babe, all boobs are beautiful to me. For reals. Yours are spectacular and don’t ever disparage them in my presence again. You rock.
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You crack me up!! So glad we had lunch together!
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 31st, 2009 at 8:59 pm
@secret agent mama, Mmmm, Secret Agent Mama. Me luv you long time. Glad we had lunch together, too. You make me laugh.
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Phew! Glad I got my boobs on your blog first.
I totally saw something on Twitter about controversy, and couldn’t find out what because I was between garage sale patrons.
But, hey, you got a figure you can’t please everyone, right?
By the way, you are welcome to deep, spiritual thoughts about my boobs. I know I do!
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Secondhand Karl Reply:
July 31st, 2009 at 9:00 pm
@Lynda, Everybody? Hell, I’m happy if I can please half a dozen people.
Your boobs rock.
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