100 Things About Karl, Part Three
By Secondhand Karl on April 11th, 2008
Today’s 10 things (out of the entire 100 Things project, still in progress) are going to be dedicated toward my weird quirky stuff.
- I will NOT be late to a movie. If I miss any of the film previews then I start getting a rather nasty twitch. Much easier to just leave and go to another movie or the next showing. I’m not kidding. The previews are the best part of the entire movie-going experience. You know, besides being anally raped at the concessions stand.
- I do NOT share my drink with anyone, nor will I drink out of someone else’s glass (unless I get the first sip). It grosses me out, can’t do it. I can make out with you and do the Two-Tongue-Tango with no problem. Just don’t make me take a sip of your water. *shivering* OK, if you’re stranded in the middle of the desert and I happen to come across you and you’re dying of thirst, I’ll let you drink out of my water bottle. Um, no, that’s okay. You keep it now. Do I want a taste of your cake off of your spoon? Aw, that’s sweet. Thank you, but are you psychotic?
- When eating cereal, I cannot take a bite without first going through the bowl with my spoon, submerging every single piece of cereal under the milk at least twice.
- Something on me is always moving, usually my legs or my feet. Constantly shaking or tapping. It’s rather difficult for me to sit still. It annoys the crap out of me in those rare moments that I’m conscious of it. I don’t know what it is, there’s comfort in the movement or something. When I first heard of “restless leg syndrome” I thought “that’s me!” Because yeah, what I need is another fucking syndrome.
- I’m such a perfectionist that it often feels better to me not to start something at all, rather than not do the job just right. This is why my bedroom is a disaster area. Total clutter. It’s not that I like it, I just don’t know where to begin. And I know I can’t do it all in a short amount of time, probably not even a day. So it’s better just to leave it.
- It’s because of #5 that I’m a damn good editor. Don’t worry, though, I deliberately flip off my internal editor when I’m reading people’s blogs. For the most part. If there are 12 misspelled words per sentence, though? Yeah, I’m going to let you have it. I often have to fight myself to keep from rewriting people’s shit. Hell, I often have to fight myself to keep from rewriting MY shit.
- I love chewing gum. My favorite is Stride because that flavor really does last an awfully long time. I cannot, however, chew only one piece at a time. In fact, I must chew three pieces at a time. That is the perfect amount of gum: three pieces. This leads to one disappointment per pack because each pack of Stride gum (and Orbitz) contains 14 pieces of gum. Not 15. 14. That means somewhere along the consumption of that pack I can only have two pieces of gum at one chewing. Yes, I think about these things. You don’t?
- I swallow my gum. I never, ever spit it out. Shut up. I’ve been doing it for as long as I’ve been running and I’m just fine. It doesn’t just sit there in your intestines. It passes through your system. Listen, I chew it, it’s food, I swallow it.
- I sing to the frog that is sitting out there on my sidewalk every night when I go outside to smoke. He likes it. His name is Freddie (in honor of the New Zoo Revue children’s program from when I was a wee tyke). He doesn’t ever really give me any constructive criticism. In fact, he rarely says a word to me now that I think of it. Perhaps he doesn’t like the singing, after all. Could just be hooked on the nicotine.
- I talk in my sleep, sometimes with amazing enunciation, and often in foreign accents. No kidding. And it feels weird, when you talk in your sleep, almost like you’re talking through molasses. Yeah, I often dream where I have a really hard time getting the words out of my mouth. It’s because I’m literally forming those words in real life. I cannot be held responsible for anything coming out of my mouth when I’m unconscious. I’m probably confessing to all kinds of State secrets in my sleep.
34 Responses to “100 Things About Karl, Part Three”
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I’m with you on 4, 5, and 6. Although, I have to admit, I leave words out ALL the time. It’s some weird brain dysfunction of mine. When I type to my friend Jen in IM, I always go back and try to correct myself. She tells me, “It’s cool. I know what you meant. I read Winterese really well.”
Winter’s last blog post..Loves Fab’s Fisting and Matt’s Meat
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I’m the same way about movies. I look forward to the coming attractions more so than the movie. Especially if it’s a comedy or an action movie, they have the best trailers.
Amanda’s last blog post..I’m Gonna Need My Own Zipcode
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I can vouch for 1 and 10 being absolutely true but um, hello, number 2? I swear you let me sip one of your drinks (or two) while you were here visiting.
sizzle’s last blog post..New Me?
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You know that am completely with you on both numbers 1 and 2. I also will not let anyone take a bite of my fruit or cereal. Grody.
Hilly’s last blog post..Let’s Take One More Rocket To The Moon….
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Haha, I thought I was the only one who did the Cereal Immersion Ritual.
And I fucking HATE being late to movies. I hate being late *anywhere*, but walking in on a movie when the theatre is dark, squeezing past people in order to sit down… I’d rather gnaw out my large intestine. Or something.
James’s last blog post..Video test.
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You swallow your gum? GAH!
I won’t be late to the movies either. And I do the same thing with my cereal, especially if it’s cocoa krispies.
Kyra’s last blog post..Too Close For Comfort
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I, too, cannot be late to movies. I loathe missing previews. In fact, in get so into previews that invariably, once the actual movie is starting, I will turn to my husband and ask him what we are seeing because I have completely forgotten.
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Winter – I leave stuff out all the time, too. There are generally at least one or two edits/corrections after I hit the “Publish” button on the blog.
Amanda – damn straight! 20 minutes of trailers is great as far as I’m concerned.
Sizzle – I don’t think so. Maybe you were drunk and fantasizing.
Hilly – amen, sister!
James – it’s weird, I used to be late for everything. Now I’ve reformed my ways and I’m usually early.
Kyra – Yep, I’m a gum swallower. Totally true. Mmm, Cocoa Krispies. How I miss them.
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Painting Chef – funny. I can relate.
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1, 3, 4 and 8.
I LOVE previews often times more than the movie I’m actually watching.
I do not like my cereal to be dry unless it’s Lucky Charms. In that case I do not use milk at all.
I am positive that I have RLS and it drives everyone around me crazy.
And I almost always swallow my gum as well. Never really thought twice about it.
Lady Jaye’s last blog post..Crap
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Lady Jaye – you get hotter and hotter by the second.
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You know state secrets?
My son laughs in his sleep, it is at once hysterical funny and creepy.
Nat’s last blog post..So who are you?
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We are soooo going to share a drink at TequilaCon. I’m on a mission now.
Oh, and I always swallow my gum too.
Miss Britt’s last blog post..Sucking. At Life.
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I can relate to #5. My room is a mess too, but not because I am a perfectionist.I’m just lazy. It got out of hand and now I don’t know where to start either!
metalmom’s last blog post..That’s A Wrap
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#3 – Good one! I do the exact same thing. : )
John’s last blog post..After The Carnival Ride
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Sugar—you just need to stretch your thinking on the pack of gum. Three packs contain 42 pieces. So it works out over three packs.
Turnbaby’s last blog post..Whiskey, Women and Song
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Well, you mean your bedroom is cluttered with sex stuff right? The vibrators, handcufss, rope, whips, lube… that kinda thing right? I mean, that’s not clutter, that’s necessities…
DutchBitch’s last blog post..Inconclusive
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I’m with you on #1 and 2, and you know how I feel about gum, too!
Avitable’s last blog post..The high of chewing
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You and I are exactly alike on 1, 4, and 7.
Mr. Fabulous’s last blog post..I know you are out there somewhere
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Your gum comment triggered my gum chewing habits:
- I prefer Orbit white, most of the flavors, but spearmint has an advantage.
- I only chew gum for maybe 5 minutes before spitting it out, mostly due to to the fact I get bored chewing for more than 5 minutes. If I am forced to chew gum for more then 5 minutes, I become annoyed and looking for any of the below ways to get rid of my gum.
- if there is a trash can, I spit my gum out. If I am in the car, I roll my window down and spit it out, aiming for the nearest pot hole in the road. If my finace is with me, she hands me a tissue and I put my gum in the tissue.
So see Karl, you are not the only one that has gum quirks. I think most people secretly do, they just don’t blog about it. Kudos to those of us that care to share this with the rest of the world.
martymankins’s last blog post..Daily Supplements
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No gum trees? No butt bubbles? No intestinal blockages?…I’m so gonna yell at my Mom.
Foo’s last blog post..You’re my obsession…
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2, 5 and 10 are me too! I am not sure I have ever met someone else who does number 2 (on your list, not the potty number 2!) People look at me funny when I do the oh no, you can keep it now thing, but I just can’t take it back after someone else has shared with me.
tori’s last blog post..Overwhelmed But Happy
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Nat – Oh, I know secrets.
Miss Britt – hopefully, you’re rich so you can ply me with tons of liquor, because that’s what it’d take.
MetalMom – yeah, I’m likely lazy, too. Every time I mention that to a therapist, however, they say that I’m NOT lazy, I’m mentally ill. What, I can’t be BOTH?
Dutchy – Of course that’s what I meant. All the sex toys are everywhere. The love swing, the anal love beads, the diesel-powered vibrators.
Avitable – we’re like twins separated by parents!
Fab – another kindred spirit.
Marty – how on Earth can people NOT care about this stuff? It’s important, dammit!
Tori – babe, you can drink around me as much as you want without fear.
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i am 100% with you on #2.
(clarification: your second answer…not you know, um, the bathroom number 2. because i can’t know for sure if i’m with you on that one…)
ali’s last blog post..things i have learned this week…
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Ali – Yeah, I haven’t even gotten to my bathroom things yet.
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I swear to God that you took #5 from, um, somewhere on my blog. It is my excuse for being a supreme procrastinator.
I know now why I like you. You are less than or as crazy as I am. Crazy people RAWK.
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Shelli – I have deliberately been avoiding reading other people’s 100 just to make sure I’m not inadvertently copying. But I’m sure we’re quite compatible, us crazy folks need to stick together.
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Re: #6
I should have you proofread my blog. I wind up editing each sentence multiple times before I can write the next sentence. If I wrote a “draft” without fixing errors along the way, my posts would be completely unreadable. I swear I’m a little bit dyslexic.
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I don’t know if I have a 100 things anymore. I don’t know if there are 100 things about me that people who read me don’t know. Maybe I should just do one a piece at a time, like you did. Wait until you read the last 10 in 2010. That’s how long it will take me because I am the queen of procrastination.
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Stacey – I have to shut my editing eyes off when I’m drafting a post. Otherwise I’d never get past the first paragraph.
Shelli – Hell, I still have 70 items to go, so who knows how long it’ll take me.
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I don’t have restless leg syndrome, but I do have ADHD. This accounts for me always having to have either my mind, my hands, or my mouth kept busy and when none of these can be then it is my leg. (Yes I know the above could be taken oh so wrongly… LOL).
You sound as quirky as me. Funny there are more quirky folks out there than I realized.
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Yeah, I’ve got ADHD, as well. If I’m chewing gum it actually helps the leg thing.
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I may have to try chewing gum as an option when I am not allowed to move about or talk or do much of anything (not that I put myself into those situations often, mind you).
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Gina – The leg thing doesn’t really bother me as much as I’m sure it bothers other people. I try to remain conscious of it when I’m sitting beside someone on a sofa.
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